Norwegian true black metal
0
Kāds ir tavs mīļākais black metal albūms?
Komentāri sakārtoti pēc to ievadīšanas datuma
0
nu vareetu buut Gorgoroth - Under The Sign Of Hell
, Twilight of the Idols .

Vai Carpathian forest - Defending The Throne Of Evil , Morbid Fascination Of Death.

un protams Nattefrost - Blood & Vomit
0
anthrax-Attack of the Killer B's-1991
0
Kaut arī man black metal naturaali riebjas, tomeer Catamenia-Chaos Born ir viens liels izneemums
0
amm pēdējālaika THE ELYSIAN FIELDS - Suffering G.O.D. Almighty [2005].... tik nejauciet ar ELYSIAN FIELDS, šitiem priekšā THE!!!
0
DARKTHRONE
album: "Transilvanian Hunger" (1994)
0
Burzum, nekaa nevaru dariit, patiik. Nevaru izshkjirties, Daudi Baldrs vai Det som engang var.
Paldies, ZVG, paldies:))
0
Un kā tad ar klasiskām vērtībām kā Immortal??
0
teach children to vorship satan

dar......
0
dark funeral :P
0
neaiztikt, tie nav norveegji!
0
Immortal - Blizzard Beasts
0
Nu ja no norvēģ tad laikam Dimmu Borgir - Puritanical Euphoric Misantropia (no galvas uzrakstīju!)
0
Oj bļa tomēr nepareizi. Misanthropia ir pareizi. FAK!
0
Burzum - Hvis Lyset Tar Oss - 1993
In The Woods - A Return To The Isle Of Men - 1996
Elite - Kampen! - 2004
Daudur - Daudur - 2005
Gehenna - First Spell - 1994
Hades - ...Again Shall Be - 1994
Satyricon - Dark Medieval Times - 1993
Tartaros - The Grand Psychotic Castle - 1995
Mysticun - In The Streams Of Inferno - 1993

0
<Enemy>, šodien, plkst. 17:00
Nu ja no norvēģ tad laikam Dimmu Borgir - Puritanical Euphoric Misantropia (no galvas uzrakstīju!)

ja D Borgir ir TRUE NORVEGIAN BLACK.... tad jau KORN ir death metal...
0
KoRn ir Death Metal. Nezināji?
0
roof, vakar, plkst. 19:53
Kaut arī man black metal naturaali riebjas, tomeer Catamenia-Chaos Born ir viens liels izneemums

Catamenia vispar ir no Somijas :)
0
to roof: Man atkal death naturaali riebjas!
0
Ā nu jā pareizi. Grupas kam ir vairāk par 1000 klausītāju jau vairs nav tr0ve un tās jau vairs nedrīkst pieminēt. Nē nu labi es saprotu ka DB nav gluži tāds black metal kā jūs te gribat, bet es tā sapratu ka runa iet tieši par NORVĒĢIJU. Nu labi es esmu poke lohs kurš neko nesaprot.

Labi ja jau var no citām valstīm arī tad Behemot - From the pagan vastelands man ļoti patīk kā veicais black. Arī pirmie Immortal albumi bet tagad laikam man atkal piesies bumbas ka Lauris Reiniks ir Burzum sekotājs un tādā garā. >:(
0
Dimmu Borgir skan labi. Man liekas, ka true ir tas, kur ir iekšā sirds ielikta, kas nav tikai mūzika, bet pārliecība or samting. Piemēram, Immortal jaunībā ļoti nopietni gribēja apvienoties ar mistiskajiem spēkiem, tāpēc arī viņu pirmie albūmi ir tik black atmosfēriski.
0
to peteris: Nu godiigi saku ka man black riebjas bet taa jau nav black vaina vienkaarshi man riebj taa atmosfeera kas pamataa tur valda un muuzika pati par sevi. Death savukaart klausos labpraatiigi un tas man loti iet pie sirds hehe.
Ja Tev riebjas death metal tad klausies kaut ko citu :D :D
0
Sadodsamiessavaas spalvainajaas rocinaas un sakam vaardu "riebjas".. Leonardin, iededz sveciites taksh tai egliitei

sonnenmensch

MysticuM nevis Mysticun
In the woods TRUE black metal... let it be :D
0
Nē.. pārāk garš tas saraksts, nemaz neriskēšu.
0
kāda š
kirba kuras valsts....
0
Šķirba starp death un black ir tāda, ka black vairāk iedveš dēmonisko pasaules redzējumu, kad death vienkārši dzied par asinīm & gļotām, bet tev paliek iespēja neizmainīt savu pasaulsredzējumu, turpināt būt kristietim piemēram, bet black baigi uzspiež (iedveš) citu pasauls redzējumu. Nu tā ir 1 šķirba starp death un black, ir arī muzikālā, ko noformulēt es, protams, nespēju.
0
^^^ MysticuM nevis Mysticun
In the woods TRUE black metal... let it be :D

Nu drukas kljuda, kam negadas.

Bet, kas saistas ar In The Woods, tad vinju pirma era lidz 1997 gadam ir un bija muzikali veidota izjot pec Black metal klishejam (liriska zinja - ja tas jau bija sava veida romantiskais paganisms), tachu tas, kas ar vinjiem notika pec tam, ta saucama Pink Floyd ievirze ir pavisam jau cits stasts.
Un tieshi mans pieminetais albums, ir visvairak no Black, jo, tas tika oficiali izdots jau pec "HeArt of Ages", kaut gan satureja muzikalo materialu, ierakstitu jau agrak.
0
teoreetiski mazliet veel Susperia bet praktiski tas laikam neskaitaas :D

Maigonis

Tu jau saac runaat par tiem psihiski nestabilajiem zakeeniem kuriem vienalga ko padod pagremot.
Nu striideeties buutu mulkiigi tikai parteikshu to, ka death tomeeer var pieradinaat arii pie apzinas ka naave ir neizbeegama un to veidi dazhaadi un kaut kaa ar laiku vairs nav nekaadu bailu. Un protams pati muuzika par sevi ar visiem growl'iem, galjas rifiem un apaatiskajiem kviiiii :D :D
savukaart black metaalaa var ostiit lucifera apenes :D
0
blja es esmu paalii un neko neesmu spejiigs
saprast ko tu esi tur ierakstiijis.
es tik redzu kautkaadus burtus bet jeegu nevaru saprast =]
0
Dimmu Borgir-"Puritanical Euphoric Misantrophia"; no "Death Cult Armageddon" - Progenies Of The Great Apocalypse, Blood Hunger Doctrine.
0
Emperor - Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk un Darkthrone - Panzerfaust.
0
Starpcitu kursh man vareetu taa saprotami izstaastiit kapeec tas true black vienmeer tieshi ar Norveegiju saistits tiek? Vai tad somu black metaals nav tik naturaals vai arii Norveegijaa tas viss bija aizsaacies?
0
a kur Lielbrit
anija?? :DD
0
Laikam tāpēc, ka Norvēģijā tas black metal tāds, kādu to parasti saprot, ir radies un tur ir pa pillo ietekmīgu grupu. Bez tam, viņi iedvesmojas no Norvēģijas skarbās ziemas, biezajiem mežiem un tumšajām naktīm. Tādā Anglijā, piemēram, nekā no tā visa nav, tāpēc viņiem atliek tikai apgremot un atgremot Sātana tēmu.
0
Burzum - Hvis Lyset Tar Oss
Troll - Drep De Kristne
Immortal - A the Heart of the Winter
Satyricon - Nemesis Divina
Emperor - dod dievs atmiņas... nu vienvārd sakot, kur intro beidzas ar vārdiem "I am the Emperer".
Enslaved - Frost vei Eld, lai gan kāds tur true black.

pietiks.
0
Emperor - dod dievs atmiņas... nu vienvārd sakot, kur intro beidzas ar vārdiem "I am the Emperor"

"Anthems To The Welkin At Dusk"

yup, tiešām šedevrs.
0
Šedevrs - pārraxtītais un pārizdotais DIMMU BORGIR "Stormblåst"!!!!
0
EMPEROR - "Anthems To The Welkin at Dusk"
Absolūtais nr 1. manā sarakstā!
0
NAv mans mīļākais stils, bet nu tie pieminētie klasiķi arī man tīri lielā cieņā:

Immortal - At the Heart of Winter
Emperor - Anthems to Welkin at Dusk
Satyricon - Nemesis Divina

Cik es saprotu, norvēģu black par true tiek uzskatīts galvenokārt tāpēc, ka to tā saucamo otro vilni vaļā palaida tieši norvēģi - Mayhem un Burzum. Varbūt kļūdos.
0
Mayhem "Live in Leipzig". Atceraties tādu gadījumu? Beherit "The Oath of Black Blood" un "Drawing down the Moon", Impaled Nazerene "Tol corpmt norz norz norz" nav pieminēšanas vērti? Vēl nesen taču tieši viņi svēra pasauli.
P.S. Bļin.
0
Whoops! Ka tik nesataisīju sūdus! Šeit taču laikam drīkst pieminēt tikai norvēģus.
Cik stulbi sanāca.
Jāiet mājās.
0
BEHERIT - respekts, kaut no Somijas, tachu vinju pirmais albums pusi norvegju parsita ar savu truuuu :)
0
cik daudz naivo praatu ir izpists un tiks izpists veel no visa shii naida ko veido Mayhem, Emperor, Beherit un Burzum ideologija muuzikaa... baisi metas... Sanaak....Stay true - be hater
0
Hmmm... jā!
0
Tā taču veca lieta. Neko tur nevar darīt.
0
Mayhem - De Misteriis dom Satanas
0
Es nespēju noticēt, ka beidzot kāds to pateica...

fjūūūūnerralljj...

...fog!

stulbie blekkeri! Ko jūs no blekka saprotat... ai ai.
0
Pagaidi, Faunuk. Es neesmu attapīgs, nesapratu Tavu komentāru. Paskaidro,lūdzu, vai Funeral Fog Tev liekas pats labākais, kas pasaulē radies, vai arī Tu esi duraks?
0
Un tu biji spējīgs izdomāt tikai divus variantus, brašuli?
0
Bļin, atbildi uz tiem pašiem diviem.
0
Antestor - The Forsaken
0
Roof - a zini, ka shita ir kristieshu grupa? ^^^
0
Parasti starp variantiem izvēlās, nevis atbild uz tiem.
0
Sonnenmensch

Zinu gan un man ar to nav nekaadu probleemu hehe Runaajot par liriku, tad sociaalaas, politiskaas un religiskaas teemas, kristietiibu ieskaitot, mani visvairaak saista bet galvenais protams ir un paliek muuzika.
0
ble a mani nahuj draugos pipeles noblokjeeja nupat :F, kaa es tagad ar mazgadiigajaam maukjeleem seksu sarunashu, KAAA?!! pizdec ;F
0
ai poh...
"ladies and gentleman, on the keyboards - mister DIZZY REED!"!!
0
Artuur, iespējams, tev nav tādas dzīves pieredzes, bet ir tāds likums "nekad nepinies ar mazgadīgajām", sūdi var sanākt ĻOTI LIELI un to es saku nopietni un kā draugs.
0
nu nu bisk jau var hehe, nu un nejau ar pavisam mazajaam, nu bet taadaam virs 16, tas jau norm, taas jau arii taas griboshaakaas. nemaak nevella tho :F
0
HAHAH HAHAHA STUUULBIE IDIOTI DRAUGIEM.LV ADMINI
0
ble a jaunajaa versijaa neesu blokjets :D
0
Pēc idejas jau arī 17 gadīgā var pateikt, ka tu esi viņu pa daudz paņēmis priekšā un tad jau nepilngadīgo pavešana un sēdēšana aiz restēm ar zekiem, kuriem tu varēsi apliecināt, kāds tu esi reāls vecis :) tikai tas būs grūts ceļš.
0
True&evil Latvian draugiem.lv :D
0
a fig viņ zin!!
0
Jā, vispār, Faun, parasti tā ir gan.
0
bljē, draugiem.lv domubiedru grupa
Metāls

Kam patik skala laba muzika piemeram: S.O.A.D, LINKIN PARK, LIMP BIZKIT, GUANO APES, APOCALYPTICA, SLIPKNOT, NIRVANA, THE RASMUS, EVENESENCE, NIGHT WISH, KORN, TOKIO HOTEL!!! KURIEM PATIK KEDES UN VISS KAS IR SAISTITS AR METALU TAM BUS ISTA VIETA SEI...

kruta
0
Ā ķēdes, man jau likās, ka kedas.
0
Vispār jau par metālu var pamanīties nosaukt ļoti daudz ko - sākot jau ar Led Zeppelin, Uriah Heep un beidzot ar augstāk minēto numetālu. Metāls nav tikai death/black, atcerieties to un nekad neaizmirstiet, jo tā stunda ir tuvu.
0
parādas klona intelekts...
0
Laikam jau tās ķēdes ir domātas kā dekorācija pie platām biksēm.
0
vaitad neesi redzējis īstu nu-metālistu!!! Platās biksēs, kāda trekna ķēde, 'dzempers ar kapuci, vēk kāds kruts kepons...
0
Hmm, man arī ir kapuce un dažreiz arī Metallica un Cannibal Corpse staigā ar kapucēm brīvajā laikā. Uz Garage inc. vāciņa ir arī keponi.
0
un
0
par to blek albūmu (nav gan nekādi trūū, bet nu šitie man patīk)
Dissection- Storm of the lights bane
Emperor- Prometheus
Necromass- tas viens kas nu viņiem ir
0
"un" - īss, lakonisks jautājums, nekā lieka.
0
nejau visi zin kas keponos un kapučos tagat nu metālisti... pēc feisa jau var pateikt kas par gurķi...
0
nejau visi zin kas keponos un kapučos tagat nu metālisti... pēc feisa jau var pateikt kas par gurķi...
0
Pēc feisa jā - īstam true metālistam ir jābūt pietiekoši drūmam un nedrīkst taisīt visādas klaunādes kā tāds pajoliņš. Bet tusēt ir jautrāk tomēr ar numetālistiem :))) - atceros pagājušo vakaru.
0
Christfuck....
0
Dissection - tas ir trū!
Citēju Jon Nödtveidt uzrunu WOA 2005: "Im ready to kill and to die for what i believe"!
0
Peteņu Malējs ir melis! Viņam īstenībā patīk Darkthrone "Panzerfaust", tikai viņš no tā kaunās. Es visu atceros, tu, niekkalbi.
0
ha ha ha... ar saviem puņķiem gandrīz aizrijos... >:))
0
Dimmu Borgir- For All Tid
Gorgoroth- Incipit Satan
0
Taa kaa starp ieteikumiem saak paraadiities Dimmu Borgir un Emperor, nojaushu, ka norveegju teema paleenaam tiek izsmelta. Ceru, ka nevienam netraucees, ja atljaushos rekomendeet paaris no saviem nesenajiem jaunatklaajumiem - zviedrus Ofermod (vinju vieniigais 20 min ilgais garadarbs Misterion Tes Anomias ir mans pashreizeejais absoluutais BM favoriits) un Funeral Mist kaa arii prancuuzhus Deathspell Omega un Blut Aus Nord. No norveegjiem veel netika mineetas taadas zvaigznes kaa Thorns, Taake un, teiksim, arii Solefald (nav gluzhi de mysteriis stila muzons, bet tomeer norveegji ;)
0
Kāpēc visu laiku ir tik skumji, tik garlaicīgi un pat gaļima? Ja Jūs to nezināsiet, tad laikam neviens. Un varbūt pat par pimpi nosauksiet. Jāslīcina bēdas glāzē vai kaut kā tā. Starp citu, šim sviestam ir sakars arī ar diskusijas tēmu.
+1
Maigonis, vakar, plkst. 13:17
Hmm, man arī ir kapuce un dažreiz arī Metallica un Cannibal Corpse staigā ar kapucēm brīvajā laikā. Uz Garage inc. vāciņa ir arī keponi.

Viss, nekad vairs šitos neklausīšos. :DDD
Bet ja nopietni, kādā forumā viens kekss reiz kā ļoti šokējošu un smieklīgu stāstīja savu piedzīvojumu: 199x gadā kaut kāds koncis vai fests bijis, štatos kaukur laikam, kur arī Cannibal Corpse uzstājušies. Neatceros, vai tas bija pirms vai pēc viņu uzstāšanās, bet nu karoč džeks (tas stāstītājs) gājis garām CC busam un pa logu redzējis, lūk ko: Chris Barnes sēdējis un skatījies TV! Sportu! Daiļslidošanu turklāt! UN!!!! dzēris...PIENU! No glāzes, nevis pakas! Prikiņ????
0
Intar- mēs visi tā darām...., ko tur slēpt. Nu es tik sporta vietā izvēlos ko citu, piem. kādu filmu vai ko citu.
DD, bet tas tā pat kā neviens neatdzīstas, ka nodarbojas ar onānismu.
0
Tikai psihajiem death un black ir dzīvesveids, lielākajai daļai tā ir vienkārši māksla un dažiem peļņas avots.
0
Go to the woods, act like a troll...
0
laiciņu atpakaļ Sonne atļāvās In the Woods daiļradi pēc 1997 .g. nodēvēt par POPSU...
tagd ,skatos, izsakās jau piezemētāk un objektīvāk.
sk. komentu 25.12.2005.
0
Bok - a tu true black 101 rule esi lasījis? :)))
0
nē..
a kas tur ir tāds ? ) izdota tipa buklete par 100 un 1 trve black metal likumu ? :D
0
1. Don't be gay.
2. Be "true".
3. All people who aren’t "true" are gay.
4. Be grim.
5. Be necro.
6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible.
7. Break things while being grim and necro.
8. Don't have fun at concerts. Stand around with arms crossed.
9. Repeat all above while denouncing organized religion in any form.
10. Never ever, EVER under ANY circumstances...
11. ...Listen to Peccatum.
12. When someone asks you if you enjoy the music of Mayhem, point out that you only enjoy the music of "the true" Mayhem. Maniac is gay.
13. Don't play with fuzzy things, excepting that by "play" you mean "burn".
14. Don't be Dani Filth.
15. Never, ever, under any circumstances utter the phrase "Kenny G slams, man."
16. Don't be Dani Filth.
17. When your mom tells you to take out the garbage tell her that you're too metal to remove refuse.
18. Run for it!
19. Sodomize a virgin whore.
20. Sodomize anything that is not male. (Fuzzy things look out!)
21. Make sure your album goes out of print about 3 years after its release... so it becomes 'cult'.
22. When in doubt, say "True Norwiegian Black Metal!"
23. If that doesn't work, blast beats can fill any silence.
24. Turn any cross you find upside-down.
25. Nipple twisting is not a blackmetal activity..
26. Write a cult, underground, grim and necro zine. Feature only interviews with bands no one has heard of, even "true" blackmetallers.
27. Never ever, EVER, EVER be open-minded.
28. Never write songs less than 15 minutes long and containing less than 15 adjectives in the title.
29. a) paint face. b) go in woods. c) act like troll.
30. Don't be Mortiis (or Dani Filth).
31. Don't wear white shoes after Labor Day.
32. Don't make jokes only your mom would get.
33. Don't make jokes.
34. When in doubt, scowl with eyes downturned.
35. Don't eat Marshmellow Peeps.
36. To producers of black metal albums: remember...no low end! If it doesn't hurt to listen to, it can't be "true".
37. Make sure that no less than half of the musicians on your album are "session" members.
38. When in concert, always growl names of songs so that they are imperceptible. This will ensure that anyone who doesn't have your "cult" LP won't get it.
39. Never play live.
40. When getting ready to go to a show, completely forget that the other people there are not going to the show to look at you.
41. Use barbed wire whenever possible. (Note: this assists in being both "necro" and "grim".)
42. When asked by a non true BMer what BM is, say something like, "BM is the raw essence of pure black evil in man", in any case, make sure that by the conversations end, the other person still has no idea what black metal is.
43. Drive one of your band members to suicide, and claim he died because of the "mainstream" "infecting" the "scene".
44. Reform with "old members" and release an album intended to produce commercial success.
45. When it flops say that you meant it to fail cause anything less wouldn't be "true".
46. Have a side project. Ensure that all other members of your band also have side projects.
47. Fill out the other slots in your other member's side projects as "session" musicians.
48. Record everything in the same studio with the same producer/instruments/equip...
49. Make sure your album cover never consists of more than three colors (color options allowed: grey, black, white).
50. Publicly state that your band is "non-religious", then use the word "Satan" over 400 times on your one-song thirty-minute album.
51. Never stuff your shoes to make them appear puffy and avoid the wearing of backwards baseball caps if at all possible. Red ones in particular.
52. Insist that music should never progress and that it should still sound the same way it did 9 friggin years ago.
53. Never say "friggin".
54. Never finish anything you start.
55. The word "Hail" is the only appropriate greeting whenever greeting someone "true".
56. If feeling especially true on a given occasion, try "Infernal Hails".
57. All logos must include illegible writing and at least one inverted cross and/or pentagram. This is non-negotiable.
58. When referring to sex with a Metal Chick use only the terminology "sticking my clouded frost-spire into her gates of attrition".
59. Design complex logo for your grim black metal band on binder paper in the middle of math class.
60. Accept every interview you're offered...then pretend that you really don't enjoy being interviewed.
61. Thoroughly enjoy Star Trek: The Next Generation.
62. Wait... scratch that last one. (See rule 1)
63. Never divulge to any outsiders the Exact Day of the Divine Arrival of the Massive Hoof. Instead, inform them that they should be ready to suck the Dark Lord's greasy @#%$ at any time.
64. Use the phrase "suck the dark lord's greasy @#%$" whenever possible.
65. If you ever find that you have somehow become a member of Hecate Enthroned, be sure to piece together a music video of scrap footage of yourself walking around in the woods at night looking evil. Only, instead of being night make sure it's the middle of the @#%$ day, and instead of looking evil, look dorky instead. (See also: rule 1)
666. Own hundreds of black metal albums, demos and bootlegs. Listen to approximately 8 of them regularly.
67. Humping a ceramic Virgin Mary in front of your uncle's house is not "pimping it" (unless you tell her you're done then blow in her face like a shotgun when she turns around).
68. Refrain from using keyboard smilies when communicating via the Internet. Single acceptable smily: -(
69. Why isn't the word "Northern" in your album title yet!? Get to it! Amatuers...
70. Spelling things correctly is neither grim nor necro.
71. Norsk Arysk Blak Metal! Rahhh!!
72. No matter where you're from, pretend you're from Norway and therefore 'true'.
73. Don't be Dani Filth. (I think that's clear)
74. All pets you own now will henceforth be known as "Crucifier". Any pets you own in the future will also be known as "Crucifier".
75. True black metaller: "Many of our dark hymns are influenced by the mighty Tolkien... You have not read the works of Tolkien!? Nerd. Wait a minute... It appears I am the nerdy one after all!"
76. @#%$, I'm talking to myself again.
77. Norsk Arysk Blak Metal! Rahhh!!
78. That's better, on with the interview!
80. Create inverted crosses in all possible instances. Suggested tools: Drum sticks, twigs, pool cues, pencils, etc. (See also "clouded frost spire")
81. Profess publicly that you are a Satanist and add that you are in touch with Norway's ancient Pagan past. Pretend that somehow those two facts make sense in conjunction.
82. Stick your dick in the mashed potatoes.
83. Don't make Beastie Boys references.
84. Don't make references.
85. Satanus. Huh huh huhuhuhuh.
86. Huhuhuhuhuhuhuh.
87. If possible, design the title of your album so that it consists of three completely unrelated words. Dimmu Borgir are the master of this (i.e. Enthrone Darkness Triumphant, Spiritual Black Dimensions, Puritanical Euphoric Misanthropia, Godless Savage Garden) but you may also want to refer to Immortal's "Diabolical Fullmoon Mysticism".
88. As we all know, women have no place in the homoerotic world of black metal, but if your girl friend still won't stop bugging you about wanting to be involved in your band, give her a lame spoken word part or something.
89. Never form a band containing you, your wife and/or girlfriend, and some gay looking guy. (See also: rule 11)
90. Go to bed when your mom tells you to.
91. If it's rare, it must be good. Order it immediately.
92. I will not add that as it is not metal enough.
93. Are you metal enough to be reading this?
94. Own every Darkthrone release. Listen to exactly none of them.
95. Own cult-as-@#%$ shirts of bands you not only own no releases of, but also haven't even heard.
96. Use the phrase "cult-as-@#%$" whenever possible.
97. Attempt to randomly throw the word "@#%$" during random segments of your songs. (Kindly refer to Attilla's work on De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas.)
98. In order to make your recording more incomprehensible and therefore more "cult", be ...
0
56. If feeling especially true on a given occasion, try "Infernal Hails".
57. All logos must include illegible writing and at least one inverted cross and/or pentagram. This is non-negotiable.
58. When referring to sex with a Metal Chick use only the terminology "sticking my clouded frost-spire into her gates of attrition".
59. Design complex logo for your grim black metal band on binder paper in the middle of math class.
60. Accept every interview you're offered...then pretend that you really don't enjoy being interviewed.
61. Thoroughly enjoy Star Trek: The Next Generation.
62. Wait... scratch that last one. (See rule 1)
63. Never divulge to any outsiders the Exact Day of the Divine Arrival of the Massive Hoof. Instead, inform them that they should be ready to suck the Dark Lord's greasy @#%$ at any time.
64. Use the phrase "suck the dark lord's greasy @#%$" whenever possible.
65. If you ever find that you have somehow become a member of Hecate Enthroned, be sure to piece together a music video of scrap footage of yourself walking around in the woods at night looking evil. Only, instead of being night make sure it's the middle of the @#%$ day, and instead of looking evil, look dorky instead. (See also: rule 1)
666. Own hundreds of black metal albums, demos and bootlegs. Listen to approximately 8 of them regularly.
67. Humping a ceramic Virgin Mary in front of your uncle's house is not "pimping it" (unless you tell her you're done then blow in her face like a shotgun when she turns around).
68. Refrain from using keyboard smilies when communicating via the Internet. Single acceptable smily: -(
69. Why isn't the word "Northern" in your album title yet!? Get to it! Amatuers...
70. Spelling things correctly is neither grim nor necro.
71. Norsk Arysk Blak Metal! Rahhh!!
72. No matter where you're from, pretend you're from Norway and therefore 'true'.
73. Don't be Dani Filth. (I think that's clear)
74. All pets you own now will henceforth be known as "Crucifier". Any pets you own in the future will also be known as "Crucifier".
75. True black metaller: "Many of our dark hymns are influenced by the mighty Tolkien... You have not read the works of Tolkien!? Nerd. Wait a minute... It appears I am the nerdy one after all!"
76. @#%$, I'm talking to myself again.
77. Norsk Arysk Blak Metal! Rahhh!!
78. That's better, on with the interview!
80. Create inverted crosses in all possible instances. Suggested tools: Drum sticks, twigs, pool cues, pencils, etc. (See also "clouded frost spire")
81. Profess publicly that you are a Satanist and add that you are in touch with Norway's ancient Pagan past. Pretend that somehow those two facts make sense in conjunction.
82. Stick your dick in the mashed potatoes.
83. Don't make Beastie Boys references.
84. Don't make references.
85. Satanus. Huh huh huhuhuhuh.
86. Huhuhuhuhuhuhuh.
87. If possible, design the title of your album so that it consists of three completely unrelated words. Dimmu Borgir are the master of this (i.e. Enthrone Darkness Triumphant, Spiritual Black Dimensions, Puritanical Euphoric Misanthropia, Godless Savage Garden) but you may also want to refer to Immortal's "Diabolical Fullmoon Mysticism".
88. As we all know, women have no place in the homoerotic world of black metal, but if your girl friend still won't stop bugging you about wanting to be involved in your band, give her a lame spoken word part or something.
89. Never form a band containing you, your wife and/or girlfriend, and some gay looking guy. (See also: rule 11)
90. Go to bed when your mom tells you to.
91. If it's rare, it must be good. Order it immediately.
92. I will not add that as it is not metal enough.
93. Are you metal enough to be reading this?
94. Own every Darkthrone release. Listen to exactly none of them.
95. Own cult-as-@#%$ shirts of bands you not only own no releases of, but also haven't even heard.
96. Use the phrase "cult-as-@#%$" whenever possible.
97. Attempt to randomly throw the word "@#%$" during random segments of your songs. (Kindly refer to Attilla's work on De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas.)
98. In order to make your recording more incomprehensible and therefore more "cult", be sure to either select a singer who has only a tenuous grasp on the language to be sung. (Acceptable languages: Norwegian, Latin, Orcish.)
99. I'll tell you what your album lay out needs...Some titties.
100. And you know what else? How long since you acted like a troll? Pick up that makeup and fight, soldier!
101. You mean to tell me you read this whole thing when you could've have been prancing about in the forest with an axe? For shame! For shaaaaame!!

by Harry and Steve of Kail ...
0
98. In order to make your recording more incomprehensible and therefore more "cult", be sure to either select a singer who has only a tenuous grasp on the language to be sung. (Acceptable languages: Norwegian, Latin, Orcish.)
99. I'll tell you what your album lay out needs...Some titties.
100. And you know what else? How long since you acted like a troll? Pick up that makeup and fight, soldier!
101. You mean to tell me you read this whole thing when you could've have been prancing about in the forest with an axe? For shame! For shaaaaame!!

by Harry and Steve of Kail
0
14. Don't be Dani Filth.
16. Don't be Dani Filth.
30. Don't be Mortiis (or Dani Filth).
73. Don't be Dani Filth. (I think that's clear)
0
Why don`t be Mortiis? Laikam tāpēc, ka tas nemaz nav black, bet idustrial metal.
0
oh, piurms nepilniem diviem gadiem shitaa "anketa" man vairaak gaaja pie sirds, kopsh sapratu, ka esmu Dani, vairs nav taa prieka, ek!
0
Drūmi +
0
Man pēdējā laikā ļoti patīk tā grupa Lux Occulta.
0
Maigoni, tu esi čangālis! :) :*
Pievienot komentāru
Komentārus rakstīt var tikai reģistrēti lietotāji tapēc ielogojies vai reģistrējies!
Aktuāli
Forums
Online [0]
Pieslēgties
Meklētājs
Jubilāri
MEDIEVAL (19 gadi)
Sedmenc (15 gadi)
Racējs (1 gadiņš)
Viskas